


The Gashlycrumb Boners

by StormyDaze



Category: All the Wrong Questions - Lemony Snicket
Genre: Awkward Boners, Literary References & Allusions, Multi, Poetry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-02
Updated: 2019-02-02
Packaged: 2019-10-20 18:16:35
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 202
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17627228
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/StormyDaze/pseuds/StormyDaze
Summary: A Very Horny Alphabet Book, by Lemony Snicket





	The Gashlycrumb Boners

**Author's Note:**

  * For [radioqueen](https://archiveofourown.org/users/radioqueen/gifts).



> I like to think Edward Gorey would approve.

A is for Ashes, that cover the land

B is for Beatrice and her beau, Bertrand

C is for Cleo, the chemistry star

D is for Dilemma, her very hot car

E is for Ellington, a damsel in need

F is for Fire, a crime guaranteed

G is for Gifford and Ghede, partners in crime

H is for Hangfire, a villain full-time

I is for Ink making marks in a book

J is for Jake, a tantalizing cook

K is for Kit (and her brother Jacques)

L is for Libraries and being forbidden to talk

M is for Moxie, wearing only her hat

N is for Naturalists building new habitats

O is for Olaf, that unibrowed freak

P is for Pip, and his brother Squeak

Q is for Qwerty, a brave volunteer

R is for Roadsters and a chaperone’s leer

S is for S. Theodora Markson

T is for Taxis, and blowjobs therein

U is for Unsupervised, alone in the night

V is for Voices that don’t sound quite right

W is for Wade Academy, and its depraved misdeeds

X is for tentacular Xerophilous* seaweed

Y is for Yelling, of which there’s a plethora

Z is for identical maids Zada and Zora

**Author's Note:**

> *A word which here means, "able to grow in a drained sea."


End file.
